Cold Front #2, this time for real

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Mom and Dad arrived this evening with a truckful of potted plants from their home in Houston, and with the refrigerated rain they are all perky and ready for me to spend time with them, rearranging them in the garden while Chas chases balls into the street and Ford runs around the yard in the buff. But seriously, when I do get a moment, I’ll enjoy putzing around the garden, rearranging them. To distract me even more, the Wildflower Center is having their Fall plant sale tomorrow morning.
I’m beginning to get more excited about the land again. This weekend we will scatter and stomp wildflower seeds around the grounds, tuck a few perennials here and there. Add a totem or two. It’s time.

This just in–new phrases from Chas: “All done” (sounds more like “ah-duh” followed by a flinching refusal to eat another bite of food), and “Woof!” He is also less afraid of dogs, but at the same time Clingy with a capital WTF on me. Annoying, but with so many lovely chunks to hold, how can I really complain?

Revelation

It was eleven this morning, and we had eaten breakfast, cleaned up, brushed teeth, read a book, and the next sequence (even though out of sequence) was “wash face and get dressed” for Ford. He balked, meanwhile charming his way to watching I Robot,eventually turning the movie on outright, and I started losing it, irrationally complaining that I have no control over my kids. I was so ruffled over trying to get the kids out the door by noon, for chrissakes that I was starting to jerk my weight around and complain about not having enough control all the while. Damon walked into the room and pulled my horses to a screeching halt with his lucid analysis. He told me to rephrase “I have no control over the kids” (a self-centered, gun-in-the-foot approach) to “What does Ford need right now? What needs to happen?” (goal-oriented approach). It was an amazing moment of silence in my raging brain. All the birds swooped down to the tree branches, the monkeys stopped throwing papayas at me and the “to do” list tickertape died. It’s one of the things I love most about Damon, his ability to help me regain control over my temper (which translates to forgetting about regaining control over the kids), because hostility and irrational moments are part of my makeup as much as moments of clarity and calm. So thank you, again. I needed that, so did Ford.

SPT, Self Documentary Series #1

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Ford is now in an afterschool program from 3-6pm. It was quiet today even with Chas whining in the background as I did mundane chores, but it was a deafening kind of quiet, and I felt a little out of balance as I putzed the hours away. I missed the din of his bubbly monologues and the nonstop questions, meanwhile wondering whether it’s time I did something new to really make myself happy.